Dear Baby,

Yesterday was mother's day and it had me thinking of how much I would like to be able to feel connected to you, even before you are born. Jack, your dad, was very thoughtful and got me a mother's day present. Although, we were in a car for 80% of the day, it was nice to know that by this time next year, I will be a mom.

It's been a very busy and eventful past few weeks. Dad and I just got back from Arizona, where we celebrated your uncle Andy's wedding. It was a 10 hour drive and I was happy that you were nice to me and i didn't throw up the entire time we were driving there and while we were there.
Although it was a short stay, we arrived late Friday night and returned Sunday morning, it was packed with things to do. We went to the temple sealing which was so nice, picked grapefruits from the trees on the temple grounds- it was my first time ever seeing grapefruit and orange trees, went to the luncheon- I ate early which caused me to be slightly embarrassed but I think if I hadn't eaten I would've passed out! And then we went to the reception. I also went swimming and much to my dismay, realized I barely fit into a large sized bathing suit! It's hard to imagine because people still can't believe that I'm 4 months pregnant, or pregnant at all. They say I don't look like I'm pregnant, and yet my jeans are getting tighter and my bathing suit sizes are going up.

It was nice to have the time in Arizona to be with friends and family and celebrate, since the week before was not nearly as happy. My Grandpa John passed away, and so I got a plane ticket to Chicago and went for the funeral there. While the occasion was sad, and we all had our share of tears, it was very nice to see your Great Grandma Karen, my parents, and my sister Elizabeth whom I feel like I have not seen for a very long time.

I think it's interesting however, that such a sad moment was followed by such a happy one. And how much it truly goes to show the cycle of life. Someone has passed, someone will be born (you), gatherings have been arranged to remember, comfort, and cry, and other moments have been arranged to celebrate, look forward to the future, and rejoice.

I guess it really goes to show just how short life really is. Before I know it, you will be here, and before I know it, you will be leaving for college, to go on a mission maybe, and then to get married.

I hope I do a good job teaching you about the people in my life you never got to meet. My grandpa's love of books and storytelling, my abuelita's ability to make any person feel loved despite language barriers, my abuela's laughter and caring watchfulness over the family. All these people, you will never have the opportunity to grow up with, but maybe you are with them now. And I can only hope and have faith that you will have other remarkable people and examples, such as my mom and dad, in your life as you grow to look up to.

Love always,

Mommy